shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
it wasn't lemon gatorade
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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