And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
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