So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
