You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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