belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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