I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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