im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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