dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he puts the penis in happiness.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize