dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
from now on my penis is your penis
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
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