dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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