well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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