You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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