I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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