I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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