Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Randomize
