you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
