i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Randomize