the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Sacagawea was the original milf.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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