so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
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