There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
