I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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