Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
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b-a-n-a...keep going... n-a-n-a DAMN!
It's a boy!... Kinda.
a poster of a meteor is equal to a poster of dinosaur becuase if a guy has that in his room , hes not getting laid.
I totally agree, i got all pissed cause i didn't want anyone taking credit for Demetri Awesome Martin! :)
I want leather sleeves.
Why doesn't he ever go into the pool?...oh, he's a CAT PERSON
I LOVE demetri martin!!!!
they must have named oranges before they named carrots...
Yay texting Demetri jokes!
I go to a lot of sports bars. I'm not really into sports, and I'm not a big drinker, but I love slappin' five.
Someone in Houston likes Demitri Martin
glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.
if i ever saw an amputee getting hung, i'd just start yelling out vowels
Demitri Martin rules!
Everything is pocket-sized if your ass is big enough.
demetri is the best!!!!
my frienbd uses a lot of similes. hes like..........annoying.........ladies
i'm glad people recognize this as demetri martin's joke
peeing in the pool is different than peeing into the pool. location, location, location.
First. Oh and. Demitri!!!!!!!!!
I LOVE that man.
seeing him live tomorrow :D
YESS DEMETRI!! Every fight is a food fight when you're a cannibal
the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades...especially if your teammates are bad guessers
it's funny how finger puppets sounds okay as a noun.
demitri = <3
hiking is just walking where its okay to pee.
sometimes old people hike by accident.
I always carry a lighter with me ... I don't smoke ... I just like certain songs. ♥ oh Demetri Martin.
way to steal jokes.
this ones mine... if you cant tell the difference between a spoon and a ladle than youre fat.
I put g.i. joes in my butt
Saying ‘I’m sorry’ is the same as saying ‘I apologize.’ Except at a funeral.