i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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