having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
We are all done wearing pants today
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
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