it was like his penis was on wheels.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
