we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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