I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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