that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
