was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
