...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
