as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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