I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
love makes seman taste better
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Randomize
