What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize