How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
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