rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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