: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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