am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
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