i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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