Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
