Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize