so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Randomize
