She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
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I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
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Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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