I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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