Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
