the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
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Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
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