She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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