I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
