My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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