and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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