i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
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