Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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